Meet Catherine Hodder, Esq., author of “Estate Planning for the Sandwich Generation: How to Help Your Parents and Protect Your Kids”

Reprinted with permission from AlzAuthors.com

By Catherine Hodder, Esq.

I was a corporate and banking attorney when my father began experiencing mini-strokes and having difficulty with his memory. We didn’t know at the time he was embarking on a ten-year battle with Alzheimer’s disease. And what a battle it was.

Even though I was well versed in law and finance, it wasn’t until I faced my father’s illness that I understood the importance of having proper estate planning documents. The more I learned, the more I realized there is a great deal of information most people (even attorneys) don’t know.

Before my father’s decline, he would mention from time to time about how to handle his affairs when he died. He also made it clear on many occasions that he did not want any artificial means to keep him alive. Knowing full well my mother would not be happy with his decision, I asked him to meet with a lawyer and put his wishes in writing.

As a result, he consulted with a seasoned estate planning attorney who drafted a last will and testament, revocable trust, health care power of attorney, financial power of attorney, and living will.

It is hard enough to care for someone with Alzheimer’s. It would have been impossible if we didn’t already have these documents in place. Because of my father’s planning, the financial, healthcare, and probate matters were handled seamlessly. It allowed us to focus on our father’s care.

Seeing first-hand how proper estate planning helped our family, I wanted to help others in a similar situation. After my father’s death, I changed my focus from finance to estate planning. I wanted to use what I learned from the front lines to benefit others.

I went into private law practice in Florida with a partner, whose father, incidentally, had terminal cancer. We lived the issues that many caregivers face. It was our mission to help caregivers understand how estate planning could help them. We especially reached out to those families in the “Sandwich Generation” who had young children they wanted to protect and who had real concerns about their aging parents.

Due to my husband’s career, we moved to California. I thought about starting another practice, but soon realized what I really wanted to do was educate others about estate planning.

I wrote Estate Planning for the Sandwich Generation: How to Help Your Parents and Protect Your Kids to be a resource for caregivers. There are ten steps for creating your own estate plan and five talks you should have with your parents. It is my mission to guide others through challenges of aging parents and caregiving.

Robert H. Schuller said, “Tough times never last, but tough people do.” It is my hope that this book with help people during those tough times.

About the Author

Catherine Hodder, Esq. is an estate planning attorney turned author. She enjoys working with families who would rather be doing anything other than estate planning. Her Florida law practice, featured in the Palm Beach Post, made “house calls” to help families with their estate planning needs. She now resides in California, writing helpful articles for members of the “Sandwich Generation.” She is also co-author of Law Office on a Laptop: How to Set Up Your Own Successful Mobile Law Practice, an #1 Amazon Kindle bestseller in law office education.

Connect with Catherine

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www.HodderInk.com

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Meet Martin Schreiber, author of “My Two Elaines”

MTE coverReprinted with permission from AlzAuthors.com

By Martin J. Schreiber 

If there’s one thing worse than Alzheimer’s, it’s ignorance of the disease.

Count me among those who were ignorant. Over the past decade, I’ve learned more about Alzheimer’s than I ever thought was possible. To be sure, I’m no expert on the science of the brain. But I know what Alzheimer’s did to my heart – it broke it when it struck my wife Elaine some 14 years ago.

I’m striking back against Alzheimer’s by speaking out, to wipe out some of that ignorance of the disease. My book, My Two Elaines: Learning, Coping, and Surviving as an Alzheimer’s Caregiver, came out in November 2016. Loved ones of those with dementia say it resonates with them. I’ve done more than 150 presentations in four states, with lots more coming up. I’m energized by these audiences.

Following a recent event in Wisconsin, a man who is a caregiver for his wife with dementia approached. He wanted to thank me for writing the book.

“It turned my life around,” he told me, tears welling in his eyes – and soon in mine, too. “You saved me.”

Comments like those are beyond what I expected when I wrote My Two Elaines. My goal was to help caregivers learn, cope and survive. I felt compelled to share my own experiences so that other caregivers would have an easier time.

My book grew out of a short magazine article about me and Elaine that was published in a Milwaukee-area magazine in July 2014. Up to that time, only my family and closest friends even knew I was an Alzheimer’s caregiver. After reading the article, they urged me to use my name recognition as a former governor to draw attention to the plight of these heroes.

Fast forward to the fall of 2015, after Elaine moved to memory care assisted living. My quieter time at home was allowing me to reflect on the now-completed experience of caregiving at home, and to ask myself “what’s next?” I set to work, pouring out my thoughts on paper and on my laptop – whichever I had at my fingertips when inspiration struck.

In just two months, I had a first draft of a book, and I began to share it with not only my inner circle, but also with friends I’d lost contact with due to my caregiving responsibilities. They told me, “we had no idea what you were going through.” That made me think, if it was happening to me, surely there must be many other caregivers whose work was going unnoticed, unacknowledged and unsupported. That spurred me to get my book published.

The first shipment of books (5,000!) had barely  landed in my garage in November 2016, and right away I hit the road. The response was so great I had to order more books (10,000!) in early 2017. When it was time to order once again, I took a step back and knew I needed to include some of the “conversations from the road.” I also realized that while I had told my story and Elaine’s (by way of her journal entries), I hadn’t given our kids the chance to voice their thoughts. So now, all four of them have added their perspectives in the Epilogue.

I sincerely hope that my book is helping others who are experiencing isolation, grief and depression due to caregiving. We cannot give up. We have to educate others.

If there’s anything worse than Alzheimer’s, it’s ignorance of the disease.

www.mytwoelaines.com includes complete information, including a list of Marty’sMarty upcoming Events and a speaker request form.

My Two Elaines: Learning, Coping, and Surviving as an Alzheimer’s Caregiver is available on Amazon. To request autographed copies, use the order form at www.mytwoelaines.com.

authors@mytwoelaines.com

Twitter.com/MyTwoElaines

Facebook.com/MyTwoElaines

Youtube.com

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Welcome, Karen Severson, MD, author of “Look, I Shrunk Grandma”

Reprinted with permission from AlzAuthors.com

By Karen Severson, MD

This book has been in my head for years. It started with the constant frustration of being caught in the middle of disagreements between nursing homes and families. Sent as a representative of the nursing home to address aggressive behaviors, nurses would relate to me how horrible and dangerous the person with dementia was acting. People were getting injured and care was not able to be performed. I would speak to the families and they were angry with the homes. “They are trained to handle these problems. Why do you need medications?” The families felt the homes were medicating for staff convenience.

In the heat of these situations, it was difficult to explain all the medications I have available and all the factors going into my decisions. The nursing home staff would come to me saying the families just didn’t understand or acted unreasonable. Families were upset no one was taking the time to understand their parent. There were several families who still had not even accepted their loved one had dementia.  How was I going to explain the many facets of dementia in a way to make it clear?  I always wished I had a book that I could hand to people, so everyone involved could understand both sides of the issue. Instead of homes and families in perpetual battles, I wanted us to all be on the same team. In this way, the person struggling with dementia is provided the best care possible.

My other motivation for writing Look, I Shrunk Grandma, a Psychiatrist’s Guide to Nursing Homes, Dementia and End of Life came from seeing persons with dementia suffering. Many families cling to a natural denial that dementia is terminal. As a result, they ask for medical procedures that could prolong life, but may also inadvertently cause more suffering. When stopping numerous interventions were suggested, we have been accused of being heartless or cruel, allowing someone to die. With the experience from my mother’s death, I wanted to do what I could to decrease end-of-life suffering. Modern medicine has become a curse and a blessing. We need to help people understand its limitations. Unless they understand these limitations, it is unfair to expect them to make the best decisions for their families. Most people don’t have a medical background and feel overwhelmed.

Look, I Shrunk Grandma is newly released, but the feedback has been positive. Nurses reading the book say that they finally feel understood. Part of the book discusses why I feel people have trouble letting loved ones go into hospice care. The families that have read this have felt less guilty in doing so, as well as better able to make informed decisions.

Lastly, I had to write with humor. I find it incredibly hard to read about such difficult subjects and felt humor would make it easier.

About the Author

I am a country girl born in Indiana, but moved to Hartford, Connecticut for my father’s work in the insurance industry. My parents threw me and my siblings outside with a ball all day to keep us out of their hair. As a result, I grew up loving sports and entered Ithaca College to pursue a Physical Education degree. My chemistry teacher told me I had a great memory and suggested I go to medical school. I took my great memory to University of Connecticut and later Brown University to study psychiatry. I always knew I loved the mixture of the mind and the body and had to go into Geriatric Psychiatry. I later completed a fellowship in Geriatric Psychiatry at Albert Einstein.

Despite being a psychiatrist, I act more like a pediatrician, as I love to laugh and do it often. I find it hard to be serious. Today I live in Florida and enjoy time with my family. I still play a ton of sports, but get injured way too often. I now work in the addiction field trying to save young lives. Maybe I will write about that someday as well.

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Meet Mary Edwards-Olson author of “When the Sun Shines Through”

Reprinted with permission from AlzAuthors.com

cover_mary edwards_olsonBy Mary Edwards-Olson

I wrote, When the Sun Shines Through, because of my personal journey. I was a caregiver for my mother and watched first hand as Alzheimer’s slowly stole her from us.

My mother, Elizabeth Edwards, lost her fight with Alzheimer’s on October 23, 2017.

Caring for my mother was a roller coaster of emotions. You go from crying so hard that every inch of your body aches, to being so overwhelmed with joy when a piece of them peeks through the mask of Alzheimer’s. I was ignorant to this disease and its cruelty until I watched it slowly take my mother, piece by piece. It was hard as a caretaker to understand that Mom wasn’t Mom anymore in terms of behavior. There were days I thought she was being lazy or difficult on purpose and I would get so upset. It breaks my heart I ever thought that. It was the disease, in those moments. Please remember it’s the disease. Your loved one is in there, scared and confused. Show compassion and remember to take time for yourself. As a caregiver, we often take a back seat, but remember your loved one needs you to be happy, and emotionally and physically healthy. They may not express it but they understand.

This never-ending pain pushed me to write a book that leads you towards the light, towards the happiness that can often be overlooked because the sadness and darkness will consume you. This was what happened to me; I was so sad ~ the type of sadness that changes a person. Because of this sadness, I often missed those happy moments that seem to shine through. The moments when your loved one remembers you or a childhood event, or when they smile, or remember to tell you they love you. Hold on to that. Let that consume you. Do not focus on the horror of slowly losing your hero or best friend; that was Mom to me, she was my hero and my best friend. The strongest women I knew was fading.

I also witnessed the toll watching a loved one suffer from this disease had on my children. They weren’t just watching their Nana suffer, they were watching their mother break down begging God for a miracle. They were also watching their grandpa become more and more withdrawn, forcing smiles and happiness. I knew there needed to be a book that could help the often forgotten sufferers, the children, but also offer comfort to the adults. Thus, When the Sun Shines Through was born.

Everyone who has purchased the book from me has left with tears in their eyes or a smile on their face. Both children and adults have found peace and comfort in my book. Others have written me or left positive feedback saying my book tells such a painful story in such a sweet comforting way. The words along with the beautiful illustrations remind them to hold on to the good memories they steal from a disease that tries to do nothing but cause heartbreak. It currently has a 4-star rating on Amazon and was on their hot new release list and a top seller on Kindle.

Because of this book I have been able to partner with our local Barnes and Noble to turn the store purple and raise over $2,000 to help find a cure. The Elizabeth Edwards Grant For Hopewas created to help those in our community that can’t afford care or supplies needed to maintain a healthy happy life. We had our first event where we raised almost $5,000! The wonderful part was bringing those with the disease together with the community, those that are caregivers, and those that have lost someone they love under one roof. We gave Alzheimer’s a face!

About the Author
mary_mom_daughter

My name is Mary Edwards-Olson. I’m a writer, a mother, a daughter, a wife. I wake up every day wanting to give up and crawl into a hole, but my drive to find a cure overpowers this emotion. I fight and I refuse to stop! I talk constantly about my journey, the need for a cure, and the pain the hopeless carry. I am a voice and I refuse to be silenced! This is my first book. I have another being illustrated now along with a novel I’m working on as we speak. I have been a guest speaker at many local events and hope to spread my message far beyond my community. Thank you to all of you that fight to end this horrible disease!

Links:

Grant go fund me: https://www.gofundme.com/elizabeth-edwards-grand-for-hope

Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/Author-Mary-Edwards-Olson-112894719423653/

Take the #facealzchallange: http://alztnevents.org/campaignpage.asp?campaignid=207

Instagram: @Author.Mary.Edwards.Olson

Twitter: @authorMEOlson

Video of Journey: https://vimeo.com/243444581

Author web site: https://yram626.wixsite.com/authormeo

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Meet Lisa Wingate, author of “Tending Roses”

Reprinted with permission from AlzAuthors.com

The Gap

By Lisa Wingate

In every story I write, there are bits of real life, nibblets of sheer invention and  sprinkles of serendipity. Readers often ask me which parts are which. Sometimes, it’s hard to dissect. Our way of looking at the world comes from our experiences in it. Our passions, the things we care about enough to examine, do as well. Continue reading

Meet Miki Klocke, Photographer and Author of “Alzheimer’s: Beyond Caregiving”

by Miki Klocke

My Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s when she was 56 years old and still working two jobs. I was 33 and became her full-time caregiver. A few years into our journey, when Mom still occasionally had coherent moments, we talked about how difficult this path is and what limited resources there were to help us. There wasn’t anyone for us to talk to. During Continue reading

Meet Vicki Tapia, AlzAuthors Admin and Author of “Somebody Stole My Iron”

3-D Book CoverReprinted with permission from AlzAuthors.com

By Vicki Tapia

In 2004, both my parents were diagnosed with dementia, Dad with Parkinson’s-related dementia and Mom with moderate Alzheimer’s disease. Even though symptoms had become increasingly obvious by the time of diagnosis, hearing the words dementia and Alzheimer’s disease really knocked the wind out of my sails. We now faced the stark reality of terminal diagnoses. Continue reading

Meet Vicki Kaufmann, Author of “Elegy for Mom, A Memoir of Family Caregiving, Alzheimer’s, and Devotion”

Elegy-for-Mom_BookCvrBy Vicki Kaufmann, MA, MPSt

“Cobwebs in my mind!” was how my mother depicted the disease that ravaged her brain. Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia in May 2000, after episodes of TIA’s and early signs of dementia. She was 82 years of age. This was a major turning point in the life of our family. For me, it was the birth of a challenging new creative phase. Continue reading

Meet Linda Brendle, Author of “A Long and Winding Road: A Caregiver’s Tale of Life, Love, and Chaos”

CoverThe Accidental Author

by Linda Brendle

My goal in life was not to become a writer. I enjoyed writing when I was younger, and I toyed with the idea making a career of it until I received my first negative review from an English teacher. I don’t take criticism very well, and I took her comments very personally. Years later, though, after the sting of her rejection had faded, and especially when I became a caregiver, the need to express myself resurfaced. Continue reading